Politics, Oh Politics

Just as the flowers mark the rite of spring, large plastic billboards and wire-frame lawn signs signal the start of campaign season. Don’t get me wrong, I support informed people being politically active. The only problem is, the vast majority of those who DO put those little signs up are not very well informed (and no, ‘not wanting to pay higher taxes’ doesn’t qualify you for political enlightenment). Seeing how these folks don’t employ reason or logic, debate requires someone who is similarly equal-parts ignorant and arrogant; a responsibility I gladly take on.

Now, there’s nothing wrong with having political beliefs (however ridiculous they may be). There IS however something wrong with thinking that people want to and/or are entitled to hear/see/smell whatever cockamamie ideals you think you have. For instance, while driving through a traditionally conservative neighborhood near my abode, there’s a house along the main road with at least a dozen lawn signs, as well as a large poster board sign tied to their fence. And we’re not talking a dozen signs as in they support many different candidates; every sign is for the same candidate (ex-governor and Republican gubernatorial candidate Bob Ehrlich; which in an effort to maintain neutrality, I will only comment that his signs are ugly).

Why would someone feel the need to affirm their political beliefs to such an extent that one’s lawn becomes a GOP marching field? We can only assume that such families maintain closeted liberal tendencies, and in an effort to uphold their upper-middle class image, must overcompensate to quell any doubts about their conservativality. I can just imagine them late at night, huddled around the dimly lit computer monitor, nervously reading issues of The Socialist Review…

Whatever the case, as a self-appointed Anti-Political Sign Activist, if you have an obnoxious number of political signs, expect their numbers to be thinned, and maybe your yard to be urinated upon.