This morning, I had a sausandwich for breakfast, and I pretended that I was in one of those Jimmy Dean breakfast commercials. However, much to my disappointment I did not feel like an elliptically orbiting planet. Instead, I felt like I was still hungry, and wanted to go back to sleep (which occurred shortly after).
Now, in Mr. Dean's defense, I (being a lacto-ovo-vuvlatarian) ate a veggie-sausandwich; thus lacking considerable amounts of pig fat and/or goat semen (which I'm just assuming are two of the main ingredients of 'real sausage') and that this is likely a source of great cosmic synergy; and the reason why my orbit maintained its sporadic trajectory.
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