Is an Android by Default a 'Made Man'?

If only watching the first half of movies like Scarface, Goodfellas, the Aristocats, and Casino have taught me anything, it's that being in the mafia is a rewarding career; there are interesting people to meet, fun places to go, and much pasta to be eaten. However, recently the mafia has been getting a lot of bad press; the world of organized crime has been consistently demonized.

Well I ask: Would you rather have your criminals organized, or disorganized?

How would you like to be robbed by two homeless people on the same day? I know I wouldn't. If I had the choice of being consistently strong-armed for protection money, or having a broken bottle pointed at me in exchange for my wallet, the mafia wins hands down.

If anything, I think crime should be more organized. That way we could tax illegal activities, as well as more closely monitor and regulate them (because who doesn’t hate it when someone cuts your buy with baking soda?) It is my dream that one day, I’ll live in an America where the only people who try to take my money are those wearing $3600 pin-stripe suits. At least then I’ll know it’s going to a good cause.

Fun Facts!

• The term "mafia" comes from from the Italian Ma'finga 'ya, meaning literally 'to finger-bang'
• The first uses originated in Italian colleges during the 19th century, in what would be a chronological precursor to the modern grab-assing interpretation of historic Greek fraternities
• The mafia is present in Russia, Japan, America, India, Canada, Mexico, all of South America and Africa, as well as a limited (and ultimately short-lived) stint in Antarctica.